Lessons Learned: Reflections on My First Year of Marriage

I Wasn't Ready for Marriage: Lessons Learned After a Year

Have you ever felt scared or unprepared for something that you knew was right for you? I experienced that feeling a year ago when my now-husband sent me a text message that would change the course of our lives.

Looking back on that moment, I realize that my fear was not about him or our relationship. It was about me. I wasn't ready for marriage.

What Does the Bible Say About Marriage?

Marriage is a sacred covenant between a man and a woman. It is a reflection of the relationship between Christ and his church (Ephesians 5:22-33). God designed marriage to be a lifelong commitment that brings two people together in love, unity, and service to each other and to him.

However, the Bible also acknowledges that marriage is not always easy. It requires sacrifice, forgiveness, and a willingness to work through challenges together. In 1 Corinthians 7, Paul encourages believers to consider remaining single if they are not prepared for the responsibilities of marriage.

Why Wasn't I Ready?

When my husband and I started talking about marriage, I was excited but also scared. I had always dreamed of getting married, but I had never really thought about what it would actually mean to be someone's wife.

As I reflected on my fear and hesitation, I realized that I had some unresolved issues that were holding me back. I had struggled with anxiety and self-doubt for years, and I was afraid that those feelings would prevent me from being a good wife. I also had some deep-seated beliefs about marriage and gender roles that needed to be examined and challenged.

Lessons Learned After a Year

Despite my initial fear and hesitation, I am grateful that I said yes to my husband and to marriage. In the year since we got engaged, I have learned some valuable lessons about myself, my husband, and what it means to be married.

1. Marriage is a sanctifying process.

Marriage has a way of bringing out the best and worst in us. It exposes our flaws and weaknesses, but it also gives us an opportunity to grow and change. As my husband and I navigate the ups and downs of marriage, we are learning more about ourselves and each other. We are learning how to communicate better, how to serve each other, and how to rely on God's grace and strength.

2. Marriage is about partnership, not perfection.

Before we got married, I had a romanticized view of what marriage would be like. I thought that we would always agree on everything and that we would never have any conflicts. But the reality is that marriage is messy and imperfect. It requires compromise, sacrifice, and a willingness to work through disagreements. But it also brings a deep sense of joy and fulfillment as we learn to love and serve each other.

3. Marriage is a reflection of God's love for us.

One of the most beautiful aspects of marriage is the way it reflects God's love for us. As we love and serve each other, we are modeling the kind of sacrificial love that Christ demonstrated on the cross. Marriage is an opportunity to show the world what God's love looks like in action.

Conclusion

Looking back on the past year, I am amazed at how much I have learned and grown. I am grateful for my husband and for the opportunity to be his wife. While I was not ready for marriage a year ago, I am now learning to embrace the sanctifying process of marriage and to trust in God's plan for our lives.

If you are considering marriage or are already married, I encourage you to lean into the process of sanctification that comes with it. Allow God to work in your heart and in your relationship, and trust that he will guide you every step of the way.