Why Your Spouse Should Complete You According to the Bible

Why Your Spouse Should Complete You According to the Bible

Have you ever watched the romantic comedy, "Jerry Maguire," where the famous line, "You complete me," was first uttered? While this line may seem like a cliche from a movie, it holds much truth in the context of marriage. Christians believe that marriage is a covenant relationship that reflects the relationship between Christ and his church. Therefore, the idea that your spouse should complete you is not just a romantic notion, but a biblical truth.

The Bible tells us that when God created Adam, he said it was not good for man to be alone and created Eve as a helper suitable for him (Genesis 2:18, 20-22). The phrase "helper suitable" is often misinterpreted to suggest that women are inferior to men, but that is not the case. In Hebrew, the word for "helper" is ezer, which is used in other parts of the Bible to describe God himself as the helper of his people (Exodus 18:4, Deuteronomy 33:26, Psalm 33:20). Therefore, the word ezer connotes strength and support rather than subordination.

When God created Eve, he did not make her from the dust of the ground, like he did with Adam. Instead, he took a rib from Adam's side and created Eve. This act symbolizes the unity and oneness that God intended for marriage. When Adam saw Eve, he said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called 'woman,' for she was taken out of man" (Genesis 2:23). This statement shows that Eve was not just a separate entity from Adam, but a part of him.

Completeness in Marriage

John Calvin, a French theologian, believed that something was taken from Adam to make him embrace a part of himself more benevolently. He believed that Adam saw himself, who had been only half-complete, rendered whole in his wife (Commentary on Genesis 2:21). This idea of completeness in marriage is also reflected in the New Testament. In Ephesians 5:31-32, the apostle Paul quotes Genesis 2:24 and says, "For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." Paul then adds, "This is a profound mystery - but I am talking about Christ and the church."

Paul's words show that the unity and oneness that God intended for marriage is a reflection of the relationship between Christ and his church. In other words, when a man and woman come together in marriage, they become one flesh, just as Christ and his church are one. This oneness is not just physical, but emotional, spiritual, and intellectual. In marriage, two people who are incomplete on their own come together to form a complete union.

Love Your Spouse as Yourself

Paul goes on to say that a husband should love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her (Ephesians 5:25). He then adds, "In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church" (Ephesians 5:28-29).

Paul's words show that when a man loves his wife, he is loving himself. This is not a selfish love, but a selfless love that puts the needs of the other person before his own. The same is true for women. When a woman loves her husband, she is loving herself. This selfless love creates a bond of unity and oneness that is essential for a healthy and fulfilling marriage.

Marriage as a Picture of the Gospel

Marriage is not just about two people coming together to form a union. It is a picture of the gospel. The relationship between Christ and his church is the ultimate marriage, and earthly marriages are meant to reflect that relationship. Just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, husbands are called to love their wives and give themselves up for them. And just as the church submits to Christ, wives are called to submit to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22-24).

This idea of submission is often misunderstood and misused. It does not mean that women are inferior to men or that men have the right to dominate their wives. Instead, it means that wives are called to respect and honor their husbands as the head of the household. Husbands, in turn, are called to love their wives sacrificially and lead their families with humility and servanthood.

Conclusion

God created marriage as a covenant relationship that reflects the relationship between Christ and his church. In marriage, two people come together to form a complete union that is a picture of the gospel. When a man and woman love each other selflessly, they become one flesh, just as Christ and his church are one. This unity and oneness create a bond that is essential for a healthy and fulfilling marriage.

So, does your spouse complete you? If not, it's time to start working towards that goal. Marriage is not just about finding someone who makes you happy or fulfills your needs. It's about coming together to form a complete union that reflects the relationship between Christ and his church. When you love your spouse as yourself and put their needs before your own, you will find that your marriage is not just fulfilling, but a picture of the gospel that points others to Christ.