The Problem with the Pinterest Dream Wedding: A Call to Simplicity and Love

The Problem with the Pinterest Dream Wedding

Dear engaged Christian couple,

First of all, congratulations on your upcoming wedding! It's a joyous occasion that marks the beginning of a new chapter in your lives. As you prepare for this special day, you may find yourselves caught up in the excitement of planning the perfect wedding. You may be scrolling through Pinterest boards, looking for inspiration and ideas to make your wedding day unforgettable.

But as your pastor and counselor, I want to caution you about the dangers of the Pinterest dream wedding. While there's nothing wrong with wanting a beautiful and memorable wedding day, there's a fine line between making it special and turning it into a competition or a performance.

The Pressure to Perform

In our culture, weddings have become more than just a celebration of love and commitment. They've become a status symbol, a way to impress others and show off your wealth, taste, and creativity. You may feel the pressure to have the perfect dress, the perfect flowers, the perfect venue, the perfect music, and the perfect food. You may feel like your wedding is a reflection of your worth as a person and a couple, and that you need to outdo your friends, family, and even strangers on social media.

This pressure to perform can lead to stress, anxiety, and conflict between you and your fiancé, your families, and your vendors. It can also distract you from the real purpose of your wedding, which is to glorify God, celebrate your love, and make a covenant with each other in the presence of your witnesses.

The Cost of Comparison

Another danger of the Pinterest dream wedding is the cost of comparison. When you see other couples' weddings on social media, you may feel envious, inadequate, or inferior. You may start to compare your wedding to theirs, and find flaws and shortcomings in your plans. You may even start to doubt your relationship, wondering if you're meant to be together if you can't have the same kind of wedding as your peers.

This comparison game can rob you of your joy, peace, and contentment. It can also distort your view of love, marriage, and God's plan for your life. You may start to believe that your wedding is more important than your marriage, that your appearance is more important than your character, and that your happiness is more important than your holiness. You may forget that a successful wedding is not measured by how many likes or comments you get on Instagram, but by how well you honor God and serve each other.

The Call to Simplicity

So what's the solution to the Pinterest dream wedding? It's not to abandon your dreams or settle for less than you desire. It's to embrace a different vision of what a wedding can be, one that is based on biblical principles and values, not cultural trends and expectations.

One of the most important values that God teaches us about weddings is simplicity. In the Bible, weddings were not elaborate affairs with fancy decorations, gourmet meals, and designer gowns. They were simple gatherings of family and friends, where the couple made their vows and received their blessings. The focus was not on the external trappings of the event, but on the internal commitment of the couple.

For example, in the Gospel of John, we read about a wedding that Jesus attended in Cana of Galilee. It was a humble wedding, hosted by a poor family, and they ran out of wine. Jesus performed his first miracle by turning water into wine, not to impress the guests, but to show his compassion and glory. He revealed his power and love in the midst of a simple and ordinary event.

Similarly, in the book of Ruth, we read about the wedding of Ruth and Boaz, which was also a modest affair. Ruth was a foreigner, a widow, and a lowly gleaner in the fields. Boaz was a wealthy landowner, but he didn't flaunt his wealth or status. He treated Ruth with kindness, respect, and generosity, and he honored her by following the customs of their culture. Their wedding wasn't a grand spectacle, but a humble expression of their devotion to each other and to God.

These examples show us that God doesn't value weddings based on their external features, but on their internal meaning. He cares more about the quality of your commitment than the quantity of your decorations. He wants you to focus on the substance of your relationship, not the style of your wedding. He calls you to embrace simplicity, not extravagance, as a way to honor Him and each other.

The Power of Love

The other value that God teaches us about weddings is love. Love is the foundation of marriage, and it's the essence of God's character. Love is not a feeling or an emotion, but a choice and a commitment. Love is patient, kind, forgiving, and sacrificial. Love is not self-seeking, but other-centered. Love is not conditional, but unconditional. Love is not temporary, but eternal.

When you make your vows on your wedding day, you're not just expressing your current feelings for each other, but your future intentions. You're promising to love each other for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part. You're making a covenant, a sacred agreement, with God and each other, to honor, cherish, and serve each other as long as you live.

That's why your wedding is not just a one-day event, but a lifelong journey. Your wedding is not just about you, but about God's plan for your salvation and sanctification. Your wedding is not just a celebration of your love, but a reflection of God's love for the world.

So don't let the Pinterest dream wedding distract you from the power of love. Don't let the pressure to perform or the cost of comparison steal your joy and your peace. Instead, let your wedding be a testimony to God's grace and truth. Let your wedding be a witness to the world of your faith and your hope. Let your wedding be a worship service, where you give thanks to God for His goodness and mercy.

The Practical Application

Now that we've discussed the problem with the Pinterest dream wedding and the call to simplicity and love, let's talk about some practical ways to apply these values to your wedding planning.

1. Set your priorities

Before you start planning your wedding, sit down with your fiancé and make a list of your priorities. What matters most to you? Is it the venue, the food, the music, the photography, the decorations, or something else? Rank your priorities in order of importance, and allocate your budget and your time accordingly. Don't try to have everything at once, or you'll end up with nothing that really matters.

2. Stick to your budget

Speaking of budget, it's important to set a realistic budget and stick to it. Don't overspend on your wedding, or you'll regret it later. Remember that your wedding is just one day, but your marriage is a lifetime. Don't start your marriage in debt or financial stress. Be wise and frugal with your money, and trust God to provide for your needs.

3. Involve your families

Don't forget to involve your families in your wedding planning. They may have valuable insights, suggestions, and resources that can help you. They may also feel left out or offended if you exclude them from the process. Listen to their ideas, communicate your vision, and collaborate with them as much as possible. Don't let your wedding divide your families, but let it unite them in love and support.

4. Choose your vendors wisely

When you choose your vendors, such as your caterer, florist, photographer, or DJ, make sure you choose them wisely. Don't just go for the cheapest or the most popular, but go for the ones who share your values and vision. Interview them, ask for references, and read their contracts carefully. Make sure they understand your expectations, and that you understand their limitations. Don't let your vendors dictate your wedding, but let them serve your wedding.

5. Personalize your ceremony

Finally, don't forget to personalize your ceremony. Your wedding ceremony is the heart of your wedding day, and it's the moment when you make your vows and exchange your rings. Don't let it be a generic or impersonal event, but let it reflect your personalities, your stories, and your faith. Choose meaningful Scriptures, songs, and prayers that resonate with you. Write your own vows or add personal touches to the traditional vows. Include special rituals, such as unity candles, sand ceremonies, or foot washing, that symbolize your union and your service to each other. Make your ceremony a worshipful and memorable experience, not just a legal or social one.

The Conclusion

In conclusion, I hope this article has helped you see the problem with the Pinterest dream wedding, and the call to simplicity and love. Your wedding is a special and sacred event, but it's not the end goal of your relationship. Your marriage is what matters most, and it's what God wants to bless and grow. So don't let the world's standards or your own fears or desires dictate your wedding planning, but let God's Word and Spirit guide you. Let your wedding be a reflection of His glory and grace, and let your marriage be a testimony to His power and love.

May God bless you as you prepare for your wedding, and may He bless you abundantly in your marriage.