The Great Prize in Christian Dating: Pursuing Clarity and Intimacy with God's Will

The Great Prize in Christian Dating

As a young Christian, I made many mistakes in dating and relationships. Looking back, I realize that my pursuit of intimacy with a girlfriend often overshadowed my desire for clarity about whether or not to marry her. This led me down a path of dating too young, jumping from relationship to relationship, failing to set boundaries, and not prizing and pursuing purity.

However, through my mistakes and failures, I have learned that the great prize in Christian dating is not simply intimacy, but clarity about God's will for our lives.

Intimacy vs. Clarity

Intimacy is a good thing, but it is not the ultimate goal of Christian dating. It is important to understand that intimacy is not just physical, but also emotional and spiritual. When we seek intimacy without first seeking clarity, we often end up compromising our purity and our relationship with God.

On the other hand, when we seek clarity about God's will for our lives, we are able to make wise decisions about who to date and how to date. This not only leads to greater clarity in our relationships, but also greater intimacy with God.

Pursuing Clarity in Dating

So how do we pursue clarity in dating? First and foremost, we must seek God's will through prayer and reading his Word. The Bible is filled with wisdom and guidance about relationships, and we must be willing to submit to its authority in our lives.

Secondly, we must be honest with ourselves and with others about our intentions and desires. We must be clear about what we are looking for in a relationship and what our boundaries are. This not only helps us avoid heartache and confusion, but also helps us to honor God and the other person.

Thirdly, we must be willing to listen to the advice and counsel of others. Proverbs 15:22 says, "Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed." We should seek the advice of wise and trusted friends, family members, and mentors who can help us discern God's will for our lives.

Pursuing Intimacy in Marriage

While pursuing clarity in dating is important, it is also important to understand that intimacy is a crucial component of marriage. In fact, marriage is designed to be the ultimate expression of intimacy between a man and a woman.

Ephesians 5:31-32 says, "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church."

Marriage is a reflection of the relationship between Christ and his church. Just as Christ gave himself up for the church, so a husband is called to sacrificially love his wife. And just as the church submits to Christ, so a wife is called to submit to her husband.

Marriage is a beautiful and sacred institution, but it is not without its challenges. It requires a deep level of commitment, sacrifice, and humility. It also requires a willingness to pursue intimacy with one's spouse, both physically and emotionally.

Conclusion

Christian dating is not just about finding the right person, but about pursuing God's will for our lives. It is about seeking clarity and wisdom in our relationships, and trusting in God's sovereignty over our future.

As we seek to honor God in our dating relationships, we must remember that intimacy is not the ultimate goal, but rather a byproduct of pursuing God's will. And as we enter into marriage, we must be willing to sacrificially love and serve our spouse, and pursue intimacy with them as a reflection of Christ's love for the church.

May we all seek to honor God in our relationships, and trust in his goodness and faithfulness as we pursue his will for our lives.