God's Boundaries in Dating: Pursuing More of Jesus Together

How often do we find ourselves drawn to the beach, captivated by the vastness of the ocean and the power of the waves? It's a place where we can stand in awe of something so much bigger than ourselves. The ocean holds an unimaginable amount of water, estimated to be 187 quintillion gallons. It is an endless expanse that extends far beyond our imagination. And yet, as massive and powerful as the ocean is, God has drawn a line in the sand, setting boundaries for the waves. He has said, "Thus far shall you come, and no farther, and here shall your proud waves be stayed" (Job 38:11).

This image of the ocean and its boundaries serves as a reminder of God's power and sovereignty. Just as He controls the waves, He also establishes boundaries in our lives, including our relationships. Marriage, in particular, is an institution designed by God to reflect His love for us. It is a picture of the love that is wider and deeper than the Pacific Ocean.

God's love for us is unsearchable and cannot be contained or fully understood. In His wisdom, He has established a boundary for our safety and to secure our greatest happiness in marriage. This boundary is the covenant of marriage itself. It is a commitment between one man and one woman, a promise to be joined together in love and faithfulness. Any relationship outside of this covenant is not meant to be a substitute for the intimacy and pleasure reserved for marriage.

In our modern society, the idea of setting boundaries in dating may seem old-fashioned or unnecessary. However, just as God's boundaries in the ocean are for our safety, so too are the boundaries He has set for us in relationships. Satan, the deceiver, often tries to make God's wisdom and love appear stingy or overprotective. He tempts us to believe that we can find fulfillment and pleasure outside of God's boundaries.

But the truth is, boundaries are not meant to restrict us or deprive us of joy. They are meant to protect us and guide us towards a deeper relationship with Christ. When we view boundaries as acts of war in love, we can see them as courageous and faith-filled steps towards finding more of Jesus together.

Setting boundaries in dating is not just about avoiding physical intimacy or temptation. It is about pursuing more of Jesus and seeking His will for our lives. When we focus on Him and His desires for our relationships, the boundaries that once seemed stale or boring become our best friends in the fight against Satan's attacks.

So, how far is too far before marriage? Instead of fixating on this question, let us ask ourselves what we are truly seeking in dating and in life. Are we after affection and intimacy, or are we after more of Jesus? If our desire is to know Him and honor Him in our relationships, then the boundaries we set become a means of pursuing Him together.

Boundaries are not easy to keep, especially in a world that constantly tempts us to compromise. But every act of obedience, both in life and in dating, is a free act of defiance against Satan's schemes and lies. By setting and keeping boundaries, we are not only guarding ourselves from him but also reclaiming territory for Christ in our relationships.

In the Bible, we find numerous examples of the importance of boundaries and the consequences of crossing them. In the garden of Eden, God gave Adam and Eve a boundary regarding the tree of knowledge of good and evil. He warned them that if they ate from it, they would surely die (Genesis 2:17). Satan, in his deception, convinced them that God was holding out on them, and they chose to disobey His command.

Similarly, in our relationships, Satan tempts us to believe that God's boundaries are restrictive and unnecessary. He tries to convince us that we can find fulfillment and pleasure outside of His design for marriage. But just as Adam and Eve's disobedience led to death, crossing God's boundaries in our relationships leads to pain and brokenness.

God's boundaries are not meant to limit our freedom but to protect it. In Galatians 5:1, we are reminded that Christ has set us free, and His boundaries are meant to guide us towards true freedom. When we align our relationships with His design, we experience the joy and fulfillment that comes from following Him.

So, how do we practically apply boundaries in our dating relationships? It starts with recognizing that any person who is not your spouse is not meant to fulfill the role of a husband or wife. As 1 Corinthians 7:2 states, "Each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband." This means that we should not engage in any activities or behaviors that are reserved for the intimacy of marriage.

Physical boundaries are important, but emotional and spiritual boundaries are equally crucial. It is important to guard our hearts and minds in dating, being mindful of the level of emotional and spiritual intimacy we engage in. Building a strong foundation of friendship and getting to know one another on a deeper level is important, but we must be cautious not to cross the line into a level of intimacy that is reserved for marriage.

Setting boundaries also involves seeking accountability and wise counsel from trusted mentors and friends. It is important to have people in our lives who can help us navigate the challenges of dating and hold us accountable to God's standards. They can provide guidance, support, and encouragement as we strive to honor God in our relationships.

Ultimately, setting boundaries in dating is not about legalism or following a set of rules. It is about seeking to honor God and pursue His best for our lives. It is about recognizing that true joy and fulfillment can only be found within His design for marriage. When we embrace His boundaries, we can experience the freedom and joy that come from following Him.

In conclusion, just as God has drawn a line in the sand for the ocean, setting boundaries for the waves, He has also established boundaries for our relationships. Marriage is a reflection of His love for us, and the boundaries He has set are meant to protect us and guide us towards deeper intimacy with Him. By setting and keeping boundaries in dating, we can pursue more of Jesus together and experience the true freedom and joy that come from following Him.