Debunking 6 Misconceptions About Submission in Marriage

Submission in Marriage: What It Is Not

Submission in marriage is a topic that can often be misunderstood and misinterpreted. In order to gain a clear understanding, it is important to examine what submission is not. Let's explore six misconceptions about submission in marriage, according to 1 Peter 3:1-6.

The Context

Before we delve into the misconceptions, let's set the context. 1 Peter 3:1-6 addresses wives and their relationship with their husbands. Peter encourages wives to be subject to their own husbands, even if some husbands do not obey the word of God. The goal is to win them over through the wives' respectful and pure conduct. It is within this context that we will explore what submission in marriage is not.

Misconception 1: Submission is not blind obedience

Contrary to popular belief, submission does not mean blindly obeying everything your husband says. It is not about forfeiting your own thoughts, opinions, or desires. Instead, submission involves a mutual respect and a willingness to work together in making decisions that honor God and benefit the marriage.

Scriptural Reference: Ephesians 5:21 - "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."

Misconception 2: Submission is not about inferiority

Submission does not imply that women are inferior to men. In God's eyes, both men and women are equal in value and worth. Submission in marriage is a role assigned by God, not a statement of inferiority. It is about embracing the unique roles and responsibilities that God has designed for husbands and wives.

Scriptural Reference: Galatians 3:28 - "There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."

Misconception 3: Submission is not passive

Submission does not mean being passive or silent. It is not about suppressing your voice or opinions. Instead, submission involves actively engaging in conversations, expressing your thoughts and concerns, and working together with your husband to make decisions that align with God's will. Submission is an active role that requires open communication and collaboration.

Scriptural Reference: Proverbs 31:26 - "She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue."

Misconception 4: Submission is not about neglecting oneself

Submission does not mean neglecting oneself or sacrificing personal well-being. It is not about losing your identity or becoming a doormat. Instead, submission involves self-care and nurturing your own spiritual, emotional, and physical health. It is about finding a balance between serving your spouse and taking care of yourself.

Scriptural Reference: 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 - "Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies."

Misconception 5: Submission is not conditional

Submission is not conditional upon a husband's obedience to God's word. Even if a husband does not obey the word of God, a wife is still called to submit. This does not mean that a wife should participate in or condone sinful behavior. Instead, submission involves a loving and respectful response that may eventually lead to the husband's transformation.

Scriptural Reference: Romans 12:21 - "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

Misconception 6: Submission is not about outward appearance

Submission is not about external appearance or worldly beauty. It is not about focusing solely on physical attractiveness to win over a husband. Instead, submission involves cultivating inner beauty and character. It is about displaying a respectful and pure conduct that reflects the love of Christ.

Scriptural Reference: 1 Peter 3:3-4 - "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight."

Conclusion

Submission in marriage is often misunderstood. It is crucial to grasp what submission is not in order to fully comprehend its true meaning. Submission is not blind obedience, a sign of inferiority, passivity, self-neglect, conditional, or based on outward appearance. Instead, submission involves mutual respect, equality, active participation, self-care, unconditional response, and inner beauty.

By understanding what submission is not, we can approach the topic with a fresh perspective and embrace the biblical principles that guide our relationships. Let us strive to cultivate healthy, Christ-centered marriages that reflect God's design for husbands and wives.