Choosing Love: How to Love When You Don't Feel It - A Christian Perspective

How to Love When You Don't Feel It

Loving others can be challenging, especially when we don't feel the emotions associated with love. In today's fast-paced and self-centered world, it's easy to get caught up in our own feelings and forget about the needs of those around us. But as Christians, we are called to a higher standard of love, one that goes beyond our own emotions and desires. So how can we love when we don't feel it? Let's explore some biblical principles that can guide us in this journey.

1. The Command to Love

The Bible is clear that love is not just a feeling, but a command. In Matthew 22:37-39, Jesus says, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" These words from Jesus remind us that love is not optional for Christians; it is a fundamental part of our faith.

When we understand that love is a command, it changes our perspective. We realize that love is not dependent on our emotions, but on our obedience to God. Even when we don't feel love towards someone, we can still choose to act in a loving way. This doesn't mean we pretend to feel something we don't, but rather, we choose to treat others with kindness, respect, and compassion, regardless of our emotions.

2. The Example of Jesus

As Christians, we are called to follow the example of Jesus. In John 13:34-35, Jesus says, "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." Jesus loved us sacrificially, even when we didn't deserve it. He laid down His life for us, displaying the ultimate act of love.

When we look to Jesus as our example, we see that love is not based on feelings, but on selflessness and sacrifice. We are called to love others in the same way that Jesus loved us. This means we love not because we feel like it, but because it is the right thing to do. We love others because God first loved us, and we want to reflect His love to the world.

3. The Power of the Holy Spirit

One of the blessings of being a Christian is the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit empowers us to love others, even when we don't feel like it. Galatians 5:22-23 says, "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control." These qualities are produced in us by the Holy Spirit.

When we rely on the Holy Spirit, He enables us to love beyond our natural capabilities. He fills us with His love, so that we can overflow with love towards others. Even when we don't feel love, the Holy Spirit can work in us and through us to show love to those around us. We can pray and ask the Holy Spirit to help us love others as He loves us.

4. The Importance of Action

Love is not just a feeling; it is also an action. In 1 John 3:18, it says, "Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth." Our love for others should be demonstrated through our actions. It's not enough to simply say we love someone; we must show it through our deeds.

When we choose to love others through our actions, even when we don't feel like it, we are living out the truth of God's love. Our actions have the power to impact and transform the lives of those around us. By choosing to act in love, we can make a difference in the lives of others and bring glory to God.

5. The Promise of Reward

Finally, the Bible promises that there is a reward for those who love others, even when they don't feel like it. In 1 Corinthians 15:58, it says, "Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain." When we choose to love others as God commands, we are storing up treasures in heaven.

While it may be difficult to love when we don't feel it, we can take comfort in the knowledge that our efforts are not in vain. God sees our obedience and promises to reward us for our faithfulness. So even when it's hard, let's continue to love others, knowing that our love has eternal significance.

Conclusion

Loving when we don't feel it may seem challenging, but as Christians, we have the power and the example to do so. By understanding that love is a command, looking to Jesus as our example, relying on the Holy Spirit, demonstrating love through action, and trusting in the promise of reward, we can love others even when our emotions don't align.

So let's make a commitment to love others, not just when it's easy or convenient, but especially when it's hard. Let's choose to act in love, even when we don't feel it, knowing that our obedience and faithfulness have eternal significance. Let's be a reflection of God's love to the world, showing others the transformative power of love.