Becoming Men of God: Setting an Example with Our Speech

As men, what if we've been setting the bar too low for ourselves in the church? What if we've been content with just avoiding certain sins and practicing basic spiritual disciplines? What if we've failed to call ourselves to a higher standard? I believe it's time for us to step up and become the men God has called us to be. We need to become a force for good, a force for God. And I want to be that kind of man, the kind of man my son can look up to and imitate.

In his letter to Timothy, the apostle Paul encourages him to set an example in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity (1 Timothy 4:12). In this article, I want to focus on speech. What does it mean for a man to set an example with his words? How can our speech set us apart as men of God?

Words have power. Jesus himself said, "I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned" (Matthew 12:36–37). Every careless word. As men of God, we need to be intentional with our words. We need to weigh the impact of what we say and speak as if God is listening, because He is.

Our words reveal who we are (Luke 6:45). They have the power to build up or tear down. So, what kind of example should we set with our speech? Let's explore seven lessons from Paul's letters that can guide us in becoming men of God in the way we speak.

1. Speak the truth about God and His word.

The foundation of our speech as men of God should be the truth about God and His word. This is not just for pastors or leaders, but for every man who desires to know and teach the truth about God. Our beliefs and our words about God are of utmost importance. As men, we should strive to know God deeply, meditating on His word day and night (Psalm 1:1–2). We should be prepared to defend our faith and boldly share what God has revealed to us.

2. Speak the truth about everything.

Telling the truth about God also means telling the truth about everything. As men of God, we should be known for our honesty and integrity. Ephesians 4:25 says, "Having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another." We must resist the temptation to lie or hide the truth. Honesty, even when it's difficult or costly, honors Christ and loves others.

3. Build others up with your words.

Our speech should be focused on building up others. Ephesians 4:15–16 says, "Speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love." As men of God, we should be intentional about using our words to encourage, challenge, and strengthen others in their faith. Our words should build others' faith and joy in God.

4. Avoid foolishness and filthiness.

To set a good example in our speech, we must avoid corrupting and destructive talk. Ephesians 4:29 says, "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear." This includes avoiding anger, slander, gossip, and crude joking. In our age of social media, it's easy to fall into the trap of engaging in these sins online. As men of God, we must resist the temptation and choose words that edify and bring grace to others.

5. Be unusually thankful.

Thankfulness should characterize our speech as men of God. Ephesians 5:4 says, "Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving." We should strive to be known for our gratitude, always giving thanks to God and expressing our thankfulness to others. Thankfulness not only builds up others, but it also reminds us of God's goodness and provision in our lives.

6. Correct with gentleness.

As men of God, we have a responsibility to correct and rebuke when necessary. Galatians 6:1 says, "Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness." Our correction should be driven by love and a desire to see others grow in their faith. We should be known for our gentleness and patience in our interactions with others, even when we have to address sin or wrongdoing.

7. Boast in the Lord, not in self.

Finally, as men of God, we should boast in the Lord and not in ourselves. 1 Corinthians 1:31 says, "Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord." We should seek to diminish our own accomplishments and highlight the greatness of God. Our speech should reflect humility and a recognition that apart from God, we are nothing.

In conclusion, as men of God, we have a tremendous opportunity and responsibility to set an example with our speech. Our words have the power to build up or tear down, to bring grace or corruption. Let us strive to speak the truth about God and everything else, to build others up, to be thankful, to correct with gentleness, and to boast in the Lord. May our speech be a reflection of God's grace and love in our lives, and may it inspire others to seek Him.